|
|
|
|
sanils.rediffiland.com/
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
SCIENCE HAS ALL THE SOLUTIONS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SCIENCE HAS ALL THE SOLUTIONS
Kyun chalti hain pawan,
Because of evaporation .
Kyun jhoome hain gagan,
Because of earth's rotation.
Kyun machalta hain mann,
Because of disorder in digestion.
Na Tum Jano Na Hum!!!
Kyun gum hain har disha,
Because u have poor sense of direction.
Kyun hota hain nasha,
Because of drug addiction.
Kyun aata hain mazaa,
Because u enjoy the situation.
Na Tum Jano Na Hum!!!
Kyun aati hain bahar,
Because of change in season.
Kyun hota hain karar,
Because of taking tension.
Kyun hota hain pyaar,
Because of opposite attraction.
Na Tum Jano Na Hum!!!
SCIENCE HAS ALL THE SOLUTIONS...true
|
|
| | |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Dont miss the moral!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(just for fun) Once PVNR (PV Narasimha Rao), L.K.Advani and Laloo Prasad Yadav were travelling in an autorickshaw. They met with an accident and all three of them died.
Yama Raja was waiting for this moment at the doorstep of death.
He asks PVNR and Advani to go to HEAVEN.
But, for Laloo, Yama had already decided that he should be sent to HELL.
Laloo is not at all happy with this decision.
He asks Yama as to why this discrimination is being made. All the three of them had served the public. Similarly, all took bribes, all misused public positions, etc.
Then why the differential treatment?
He felt that there should be a formal test or an objective evaluation before a decision is made; and should not be just based on opinion or pre-conceived notions.
Yama agrees to this and asks all the three of them to appear for an English test.
PVNR is asked to spell " INDIA" and he does it correctly.
Advani is asked to spell " ENGLAND" and he too passes.
It is Laloo's turn and he is asked to spell " CZECHOSLOVAKIA".
Laloo protests that he doesn't know English.
He says this is not fair and that he was given a tough question and thus forced to fail with false intent.
Yama then agrees to conduct a written test in Hindi (to give another chance assuming that Laloo should at least feel that Hindi would provide an equal platform for all three).
PVNR is asked to write "KUTTA BOLA BHOW BHOW". He writes it easily and passes.
Advani is asked to write "BILLY BOLI MYAUN MYAUN". He too passes.
Laloo is asked to write "BANDAR BOLA GURRRRRR....."
Tough one. He fails again.
Laloo is extremely unhappy.
Having been a student of history (which the other two weren't),he now requested for all the 3 to be subjected to a test in history
Yama says OK but this would be the last chance and that he would not take any more tests.
PVNR is asked: "When did India get Independence ?". He replied "1947" and passed.
Advani is asked "How many people died during the independence struggle?".
He gets nervous. Yama asked him to choose from 3 options: 100,000 or 200,000 or 300,000.
Advani catches it and says 200,000 and passes.
It's Laloo's turn now.
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
'
Yama asks him to give the Name and Address of each of the 200,000 who died in the struggle.
Laloo accepts defeat and agrees to go to HELL.
Moral of the story: IF YOUR MANAGEMENT HAS DECIDED TO SCREW YOU, THERE IS NO ESCAPE.
|
|
| | |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
just for fun
I Like This Doctor. DON'T KNOW WHAT DOCTOR WROTE THIS, BUT I LIKE HIM! .
HEALTH - QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION
Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... Don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! . Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO . Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.
And remember: "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming : "Woo Hoo, what a ride!!!"
Cheers Mates.
|
|
| | |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
